I've been writing for my band since around Nov/Dec of 2010 and have played and composed more all of last year.
I'm starting to think about recording and what I really want to say musically with my compositions and I'm having the hardest time with the worry of everything being original.
I think there is this and always has been a big push in jazz to find yourself and be original, I feel after so long I'm getting closer to that, I've had to stop listening to alot of modern jazz especially guitarist as I feel like all the modern guys were being such a strong influence that I forgot about ME! without even thinking I would dial in a sound and play similar things to guys like Kurt and all the others.
Basically what I'm getting at is the worry of originality is almost crippling me as I'll write something or improvise and record it and think "nah that sound like so and so or the tune is to simple, it's not jazz enough" , I feel like I've become an enemy to my self sabotaging anything I do.
I can get through it but it takes a lot of work and at the moment I don't even care if it's not that original, I think I put so much pressure on myself to create original music and have a unique voice on guitar, it's just killing me.
I think I fear someone after hearing band composition and my playing is a remark like "oh it sound great, it sound a lot like so and so or you sound heaps like that guy" which I don't care about but the pressure you feel being a jazz musician makes me fear it I think??
I wondering if anyone else has had similar feelings or thought about there playing or compositions as more then ever now that I'm looking to record all this stuff has been hitting me.
I'm also learning about dealing with musicians that are right for your sound as a band, I have a band member who is great, amazing but what I'm hearing is a different sound that he doesn't play like so I'm thinking about having to break it to him that I am looking to go with a different sound having to deal with that is an issue too. Thanks for reading, getting this out there really helps and helps me from feeling like I'm going crazy! hahah, I look forward to hearing your response and thoughts.